16 Comments

😂😂😂

As another V sweary mom (who didn’t embrace her deep love of cusses until *after* I had married a pastor, who def doesn’t love them as much as me) my children also adore swearing and we absolutely bond over it. But the REAL delight comes from how they naturally gravitate toward using swear words to track their enunciation progress. Example:

When my son was 6 he said to me, “mommy, do you know a bad word? I know a bad word. Sit. Sit is a bad word.” I was looking at him, a little puzzled, and my other children were laughing, “Johnny can’t say ‘shh’!” Then little Johnny screws up his face and with immense effort yells “SHHHHHHHH-IT!” Me: “Oh, high five! You can say ‘shh’ now!”

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7 hrs agoLiked by Shelly Mazzanoble

Omg this was A RIOT 🤣🤣🤣 I don't recall swearing being a major part of parenting for me but probably because I lived alone with my son and my mother is a church lady lol. I had no one to bounce things off of. But when he grew up he and I didn't hold our tongues. I just felt like it was the natural progression of human life 😁

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author

Yes, very natural! Some of us just progress faster and earlier than others!

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9 hrs agoLiked by Shelly Mazzanoble

This was so fun to read. I love the relationship you've built with your kiddo. We call them "grown up words" in our house. I very much relate to Bart, I was raised in a house where the word "crap" was considered cursing. My wife was the opposite, and her influence on our kids is much like your own. I still sometimes get tense when I hear a "grown up word" slip from my kid's mouth, as if the word police are going to burst through the door.

I of course learned to embrace curse words as an adult, and even thought I swore a lot until my wife informed me I barely swear at all. I guess relative to my upbringing I do, but not when compared to her. I genuinely thought I swore like a sailor, she just laughed. Her favorite phrase by the way also happens to be "eat a bag of dicks".

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author

Ahhh your wife and I would certainly get along! Sounds like our kids would too! :) I love the idea of your swearing meter being proportionate to your upbringing. Thank you for reading!

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This is fucking awesome!! I definitely am the swearer of our household and Bart must be my husband 🤣

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author

I would absolutely welcome you as a sister wife! Especially if you're of the sweary variety! And OMG, I SWEAR (as in promise) that I am literally reading your book right now (like, I PUT IT DOWN to write this comment) and at first I was like, OH F*CK! Jo-Ann shouldn't see this side of me, but then I read what you wrote and suddenly feel better about my parenting! Also your book is awesome! Also I'm a little bit star struck right now! :)

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Omg. SO…when my big boy was little, he policed my language so much. Instead of a swear jar, every time I swore, I owed him a five minute massage. He’d go around telling strangers the deal and that he just adds them up and now I owe him a three hour and forty five minute massage. Now I have a little one, who tried the wear jar thing and I said I’m sorry but i just fucking can’t. He sneaks little cusses when he can and delights so much

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author

hahahhahah "I'm sorry but I just fucking can't" is my mantra! I read this comment and subscribed to your stack immediately. You are my people!b Fuck yeah!

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Thank you Shelly!!! The first post of yours I read, I felt the same way! I was like OMG SHES FUNNY SHES SO FUNNY AND REAL!!!

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Where do you reside? I’ll let you know when there’s a show near you!

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author

Seattle!!!

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Oh sweet! I’m on Bowen Island, near Vancouver.

I have two shows coming up in Vancouver Saturday, October 26 if you fancy a getaway. Or I’ll let you know when I do a PNW US jaunt!

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You are my fucking people!!!

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author

Jesus H Christ, Chela, where have you been my whole goddamn life??? I need to see this show!!! (And read all your words-- even the non-sweary ones.)

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